It’s been one and a half weeks since I’ve moved to Los Angeles and although just about every aspect of my life have been flipped upside down, there’s always still time to party like a rock star. I am, however, living like a poor bum setting up temporary camp in my buddy Victor’s living room for the time being. So how’s life living like a bum you ask? I’ve taken the liberty of taking a couple of pictures to show everyone my awesome life; pity donations of all kinds are accepted!

Here’s my awesome futon bed that I bought because I got tired for sleeping on Vic’s ground. Notice the equally as awesome lounge chair which provides me comfortable seating in my command center. On the left, you’ll see multiple bags from Macy’s and Banana Republic. Those are all the new rock star threads I bought, including 4 pairs of dress pants and 3 spiffy ties. After all, image is everything in LA! Plus, I don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb at my new job. Which has been awesome by the way, but you already knew that.

Of course with all the fancy clothes, I got to have a way to organize and maintain my pimp collection. Naturally, big plastic tubs are the way to go if you’re short on closet space. But wearing wrinkled clothing is obviously a huge mistake, so each piece of clothing is maintained with a bit of TLC from a new ironing board and iron. So the image is like so: preparing for my mornings usually include myself eating a bagel in my boxers, ironing my clothes and watching some MSNBC for updates on the stock market.

With the little free time I got, I usually spend it either working out my rock star physique at my personal gym or perfecting my rock staring technique on some Guitar Hero 2. It’s pretty easy to see that all the necessities are covered in my small 14×14 sq. ft. area.

But something seems to be missing…. Ah yes, of course, our good friend Jack. I had to go to the supermarket and buy this bottle of Jack just because Victor didn’t have a drop of alcohol on his premises, and that just doesn’t seem right for some reason. Even though it’s not opened yet, I can assure you that there’s been lots of drinking in the past two weekends. The list includes: The Day After, Mr. Pockets, LAX, and J-Lounge, with the latter being my favorite right now. I did however, manage to become a casualty of the rock partying scene. I tell everyone that I got in a fight with defunct punk rock lead guitarist, but the truth is that there was some shattered glasses bits on the bar counter that I didn’t see. Got to give it up to Pam for her excellent first aid skills, thanks for patching me up.

Well, that’s all the update I have so far. The last 10 days have seen like an eternity to me, which is great because I wouldn’t want any day of my 25-year old life to fly away from me right now. Rock on!

And I am a big douche.

I am the genius behind moving daylight savings earlier to the second Sunday of March. The rationale behind this move is because I studied many articles from the 1970’s. I know what you might be thinking, that 1970 was a long time ago, but not so. Many things from the 1970’s still relate to today. For example, a benefit of moving daylight savings is that we will save energy on appliances such as refrigerator. They had those back in 1970, and we still have them now. Don’t all of your refrigerators look like this?

I’ve also heard that platform heals and tie dye shirts are all the rage as well.

Nevermind what the media is reporting my disco loving friends, this change is for the best. Everyone might be saying that the airline industry will have a hell of a time keeping track of this change, but I say if you get to where you need to go an hour early, that’s for the best! Also, some computer whizzes have said that many systems won’t be able to automatically adjust to these new times, but that’s okay too because the PC hasn’t been invented yet in 1970! Computers, PDAs, cell phones, software, television, telephone, radio, interchangable parts what are those?

So enjoy your new extended daylight during the summer at the price of wreaking havoc to hundreds of industries, thousands of companies, and millions of people. Lets not think about all the trouble I’ve caused to all these people, all the time and money I’ve wasted forcing other people to adjust because of my silly premonitions. I’m not really accountable for the decisions and policies I make as a Senator of the United States right? Like I said, standing in front of all the congressmen like a big douche, that this change in daylight savings “puts a smile on everyone’s face.”

It’s been almost a week since I’ve left my previous job at Lockheed Martin, and as most of my friends already know, I’m planning to make the move down to Los Angeles to start a new career in technical consulting at Booz Allen Hamilton. The move is coming up fast and I haven’t done much in terms of preparation besides swindling a free meal out of my friends at Osteria in Palo Alto. Thanks guys.

Other than that, I’ve been keeping busy with the normal life of an umemployed bum. Recently I sent an email to my friends detailing my excruciating day that consisted of:

8:00AM - Wake up
8:00AM-10:30AM - Dick around
10:30AM-11:30AM - Oil change and tire rotation
11:30AM-12:30PM - Eat BCL with Freddy (since he wants to be a bum soon too)
12:30PM-1:00PM - Haircut
1:00PM-3:00PM - TV (Star Trek midday baby!)
3:00PM-4:30PM - Sleep
4:30PM-6:00PM - Work out
6:30PM - Write this email

Which then garnered the prompt response of “i hate you jay.” from Marcus. Although I thought I had an upper hand on some of the other bums we know (David), he had to one-up me and spent his day attending a charity auction, bidding and winning six rounds of golf at the Trump National.

I have also flirted with certain death and disaster immediately after my life and health insurance plans terminated. Going skydiving probably isn’t high on people’s to-do list without any type of insurance to protect you, but I say who cares, you either live or you don’t right? Either way, it was a fantastic experience and everyone has to try it at least once. There really is no bigger rush than free-falling at 120mph from an altitude of 15,000 ft. In the video below, you can see just how fast you turn from a 5′5″ person into just a speck in the camera lens as you see Margaret fall out of the plane right before I do.

Next weekend, snowboarding at Sierra at Tahoe. See you all there.

I also put some photos up in the photo gallery, so click through and enjoy.